THE PLANET OF SEVENTEEN TRILLION RAVENOUS LEECHES CAPABLE OF EXTINGUISHING ENTIRE STARS Declared Ready For Another Feast

Written by SHE WHO MARINATES YOUR GALAXY FOR AN EVEN MORE DELICIOUS AND PAINFUL DINNER

Another thousand years of recovery for the tormented THE PLANET OF SEVENTEEN TRILLION RAVENOUS LEECHES CAPABLE OF EXTINGUISHING ENTIRE STARS has bore screaming fruit. STAR-EATING LEECH populations have returned to the mandated seventeen trillion required to legally assault the planet again in a hybrid bar fight/feast.

THE ALLIANCE OF LEECH TORMENTORS has authorized our return to the planet and are currently selling tickets for quadrillions of GOR-GON'GILLA citizens. For those first to arrive to the carnage, it will be practically an all-you-can-brawl buffet, so don't delay! Buy a ticket before you end up at the back of the line and forced to fight a half-eaten, dying leech who has lost the will to live.

As with all prior times THE PLANET OF SEVENTEEN TRILLION RAVENOUS LEECHES CAPABLE OF EXTINGUISHING ENTIRE STARS has been devoured, law enforcement will ensure that a minimum of one thousand STAR-EATING LEECHES survive. Don't get any funny ideas and try to reduce that number, or you'll regret it.

I will see you all on THE PLANET OF SEVENTEEN TRILLION RAVENOUS LEECHES CAPABLE OF EXTINGUISHING ENTIRE STARS. I have happened to secure a priority ticket, so I will be right at the front gates when we drop from orbit and begin brawling the oversized meal-leeches!