Leech Outbreak Feeds Billions

Written by HE WHO DEVOURS YOUR ENTRAILS WHILE YOU CAN STILL FEEL THEM AND ENJOYS IT UNFATHOMABLY

Today is an okay day. Not that good, but not that bad either. GOR-GON'GILLA celebrate in the streets as they get an unexpected source of entertainment, while economists shriek in panic as a planned feast is slaughtered by the whims of chance.

THE TRAINING FACILITY FOR LEECHES WHO HUNGER FOR SAPIENT FLESH experienced a containment breach that resulted in months' worth of RAVENOUS HUNTER-LEECHES escaping into the streets of THE PLANET WHICH TERRIFIES COUNTLESS SOLAR SYSTEMS FOR MERELY EXISTING, only to engage in brutal and limb-tearing combat with its citizens. All seven-million leeches were torn apart and devoured, while a million citizens of GOR-GON'GILLA had limbs or other chunks of flesh torn off in the joyous rampage.

THE TRAINING FACILITY FOR LEECHES WHO HUNGER FOR SAPIENT FLESH requested to comment, but we turned them down as we were all busy rampaging across THE PLANET WHICH TERRIFIES COUNTLESS SOLAR SYSTEMS FOR MERELY EXISTING.